Locked out of a deceased person's email or photos

Before anything else: check whether they named someone inside the service itself. Under every state's digital-assets law, that setting outranks the will — and it can save you weeks.

Step one: the setting that beats the will

Every state has enacted a version of the Revised Uniform Fiduciary Access to Digital Assets Act, and they share a priority order. At the top is not the will, not a court order — it is the provider's own tool, if the person used it:

Apple — Legacy Contact. If one was set, that person can request access with a death certificate and an access key, and it is dramatically faster than any other route.
Google — Inactive Account Manager. If configured, it may have already shared data with the person they nominated.
Facebook / Meta — legacy contact, plus memorialization settings.
Microsoft, Dropbox, and most large providers — a deceased-user process, though fewer have a nominate-in-advance tool.

Only if nothing was set do you fall back to the will, a trust, or a power of attorney — and then to the provider's terms of service. Checking first costs ten minutes and frequently ends the problem.

Step two: ask for the right thing

This distinction catches almost everyone out, and knowing it changes how fast you get an answer:

The CONTENT of emails and messages — the actual words — generally requires the deceased person's explicit prior consent before a provider will disclose it. Federal privacy law sits behind that reluctance, which is why providers do not simply hand it over on request.
A CATALOGUE — who they corresponded with, and when, without the contents — is materially easier to obtain.

If your actual goal is to find the accounts — which bank, which insurer, which subscription — the catalogue is usually all you need, and asking for it instead of full content can be the difference between weeks and months. Ask for what you need, not for everything.

Step three: don't just log in

If you have the password, using it is tempting and genuinely risky. Accessing someone else's account with their credentials — even a spouse's — can breach the provider's terms and, in some circumstances, implicate computer access laws. It can also complicate your position as executor if the access is ever questioned. The fiduciary route is slower and safer, and it produces a paper trail that protects you.

One practical exception worth knowing: if a phone or computer is already unlocked and in the family's possession, there is usually no problem with looking at what is on the device. It is the remote, credentialed access to a provider's servers that carries the risk.

Step four: the request itself

Use the provider's own deceased-user form first — it is usually faster than a letter, because it lands in the queue their team actually works.

Where a form doesn't exist or has stalled, a written fiduciary request should: identify the account precisely, state your authority (letters testamentary, letters of administration, or a small-estate document), cite your state's own act by the name that state uses, and say specifically whether you are asking for a catalogue or for content. Getting the act's name wrong is a real problem — Florida's is the “Florida Fiduciary Access to Digital Assets Act,” New York's is EPTL Article 13-A, and Ohio's short title omits “Revised” entirely. Citing an act by a name your state does not use invites a brush-off. We publish the verified names and citations on the sources page.

And if the first request is ignored

Escalate in writing, once, to a named team — reciting what you already sent and when, asking them to confirm receipt or name the missing document, and giving a firm date. Evidence that they already hold what they are asking for again is the single most effective thing in such a letter.

If you want the letters written for you

Everything above is the method, free. The Digital Estate Kit is the convenience version: a fiduciary access request that cites your state's own act correctly, the content-vs-catalogue framing built into the wording, guidance on finding a legacy contact first, and the escalation letter for when a request is ignored. Preview every word free.

Buy the Digital Estate Kit — $49 Or start the free plan

Honor & Keep is self-help software, not a law firm, and this page is not legal advice. Digital-asset law is state-specific and moves; verify your state's current act before relying on any citation.